So in just a few weeks this little girl, my first baby girl will become the Big Sister. Sigh. I am treasuring up our time together. . These last few weeks of just me and her. My first, my long hoped for, waited for, prayed for, Katy Lynn.  She has been the biggest challenge of my life so far and definitely the greatest joy (coming in a close second to my marriage to her father of course.)

 Life is unimaginable without her. I daily have to offer her up to the one that Loves her more than James and I ever could. Daily I have to remind myself that she is His and only loaned to us. Every moment I desire and pray that she would never know a day when she did not know the love of  Jesus Christ and that she would never know a day that she did not love Him. What a blessing that would be. God is so VERY good.

a philosophy

(picture from a tranquil morning at the Mockingbird, waiting for our breakfast.) 

My new Philosophy is this: do what you can, when you can,  the best that you can. This may seem simple but it really works out to be quite complex in my everyday life. 

I tend to get paralyzed very easily about all the things i want/need to accomplish. I feel like most days I am just barely treading water by barely keeping up with the dishes and laundry. When I think of all the extras I'd like to achieve I get so overwhelmed to the point that I am likely to neglect the basics even out of sheer exhaustion and the feeling that it's all useless anyway. . why even try? Why even bother with the dishes when I can't seem to get started finish the scrap book I started? why even put away the laundry if my little girls room still isn't pretty and girly like I have always imagined? This seems pretty illogical I know but it's how my mind works. 

I am not giving up on the extras because I still have hope that I can create a tranquil, pulled together, each child with their own scrap book, home. . one step at a time. Just not right this minute maybe. Right now my focus has to be on doing what I can, when I can, the best that I can. Do the dishes. Do the laundry. Plan meals. Put away a few things when you can. Organize a closet when the moment presents itself the best you can before the toddler starts pulling on you too hard. One step at a time. There will not be a perfect time to make a home. You just have to do it along the way. :)